be more dog

below is a link to a YouTube video send to me by my sister.  it shows how a cat becomes bored with its routine and decides to act more like a dog.  it is part of a collection of similar videos posted by Adam Przezdziek. (yes, I spelled it correctly)                 

BE MORE DOG

HERE ARE SOME PICTURES TO MAKE YOU SMILE (courtesy of my cousin)

You might find some of these ideas useful

i think justin is due for a stint in rehab

Jul 10th 2013 10:56 AM                                                                                        By Ashley Rose

Justin Bieber really pissed people off this time...literally!

In new video obtained by TMZ, Justin is seen, during one of his recent trips to New York City, urininating in a mop bucket after a night out with friends.

It all went down at NYC nightclub when Bieber and his pals were leaving the establishment. Instead of exiting like the others do, Bieber and friends were forced to leave from the kitchen because of Justin's fans. While passing through the kitchen, Justin decided he had to pee. Instead of going to the bathroom like all of us, he whipped everything out and peed in a mop bucket that was sitting there! Who does that?!!

The video shows Justin and his friends laughing it up after he releases himself. They even acted like they were doing the club a favor by letting him pee there. Not to mention, the guys talk about drinking alcohol and being drunk and Justin's clearly not old enough to drink the United States. Justin even gives former President Bill Clinton quite the shout out!

"F*** Bill Clinton!" Justin said after he grabbed a bottle of cleaning spray and squirted a picture of Bill Clinton on the wall of the club.

Link to original TMZ story with the video....

The Impala's Escape Plan

Impala eludes two hungry cheetahs by jumping into car full of tourists

A frightened impala separated from its herd and trying desperately to elude two hungry cheetahs took evasive action nobody was expecting at Kruger National Park in South Africa. To the surprise and shock of tourists parked alongside a road, the panicked impala escaped by jumping into a car through a window of a Toyota Prado, taking advantage of what the U.K. Daily Express aptly called a window of opportunity. Watch the incredible scene captured by South African tourist Samantha Pittendrigh on her mobile phone:

YouTube Video Of This Event

The video has 1.3 million view at the time I posted it.

And the link to the full article is right here.....

Original story from GRINDTV

Another of David Green's Poetic Verses

Again I include a poem by one of my favorite blog poets, David Green.  He writes a blog titled From Within A Dream.  The link is included below.....http://fromwithinadream.wordpress.com/

FYI, most of his works are sexual in nature.  It is nothing I would even consider calling porn, it is simply adult thoughts and fantasies that most everyone has pondered at one time or another.....

What Would It Be Like

For many years ever since puberty
desiring to make love to many different women
often wondering what it would be like
to sleep with a woman the color of ebony

What would it be like compared to a woman so white
feeling her dark arms pressing me close to her beating heart
wrapping her lithesome legs about my thrusting thighs
my engorged member deeply immersed within her wetness

What would it be like our lips pressed together
the nipples of her firm nubile breasts brushing my chest
the taste of her mouth so sweet upon my restless tongue
to softly suckle her nipples so dark and stiff

What would it be like to play with her dark kinky hair
brushing my lips upon her trembling flesh tasting her soft ebony skin
the pungent scent of her womanhood within my nostrils
listening to her moaning with rising pleasure

What would it be like tasting the wetness between her thighs
would it be spicy and hot as I was told so long ago
to kiss the vaginal lips of her sweet honeycomb
thrusting my tongue completely inside her moist warmth

What would it be like to join physically as one
with a woman of a different color as I
cuddling each other between sweat soaked sheets
listening to her breathing asleep within my arms

Yes what would it be like making love to an ebony woman so beautiful
this I will just have to wonder about perhaps for all of my life
whenever aroused by the sight of an ebony woman so lovely
still within my creative mind I can dream of what I shall never have

FYI

BEEN HAVING SOME COMPUTER ISSUES THIS WEEK, BUT HOPE I THINK I MAY BE GETTING BACK TO NORMAL 

what happens when you die

*Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so
priceless, and so so easy to see happening, customer service being what it is today.

*A lady died this past January (2013), and Citibank billed her for February
and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and added
late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now was somewhere around $60.00.
*A family member placed a call to Citibank. Here is the exchange:*

*Family Member:* "I am calling to tell you she died in January."

*Citibank:* "The account was never closed and The late fees and charges still apply."

*Family Member:* "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections."

* Citibank:* "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."

*Family Member:* "So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

*Citibank:* "Either report her account to frauds division or report her
to the credit bureau, maybe both!"

*Family Member:* "Do you think God will be mad at her?" (I really liked
this part!!!!)

*Citibank:* "Excuse me?"

*Family Member:* "Did you just get what I was telling you? The part
about her being dead?"

*Citibank:* "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor."

(Duh!)

*Supervisor gets on the phone:*

*Family Member:* "I'm calling to tell you she died in January."

*Citibank:* "The account was never closed And late fees and c harges
still apply." (This must be a phrase taught by the bank!)

*Family Member:* "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"

*Citibank:* (Stammering) "Are you her lawyer?"

*Family Member:* "No, I'm her great nephew."

(Lawyer info given)

*Citibank:* "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"

*Family Member:* "Sure."

(Fax number is given)

*After they get the fax::

*Citibank:* "Our system just isn't setup for death I don't know what
more I can do to help."

*Family Member:* "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could
just keep billing her. I don't think she will care."

*Citibank:* "Well, the late fees and charges do still apply."
(What is wrong with these people?!?)

*Family Member:* "Would you like her new billing address?"
*Citibank:* "That might help."

*Family Member:* " Odessa Memorial Cemetery , Highway 129, Plot Number 69."

*Citibank:* "Sir, that's a cemetery!"

*Family Member:* "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"

Guys!!!!

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20 th floor

of a building.

They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned

beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Burritos again! If I get Burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too."

The blonde opened his lunch and said, " Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too."

The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.

The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a Burrito, and jumped, too.

The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping.She said,

"If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!"

The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas !

I didn't realize he hated Burritos so much."

(Oh this is GOOD!!)?

Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said,

"Don't look at me. He made

his own lunch"

Dear Abby

Subject: Subject: Dear Abby Subject: Letters Dear Abby admitted she was at a loss to answer: Dear Abby: A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese? Dear Abby: What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Foul Language and Violence on my VCR? Dear Abby: I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his. Dear Abby: I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boy friend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him. Dear Abby: I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again. Dear Abby: Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own? Dear Abby: My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy. Dear Abby: I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober. Dear Abby: My mother is mean and short tempered. I think she is going through mental pause. Dear Abby: You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband has lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?

This Is The Story

Too cute....

A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"

The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

YOU'VE GOT MALE

Question #12 from The Interview of my life

(the first 11 questions can be found earlier in this blog)

12) With the procedures that you went through, if you had to do this again in another life would you?

If I understand the question right, Amber, yes I would do the same thing again without any hesitation, but hopefully much sooner in life than I did this time around. I spent way too many years worrying about what ‘everyone else would think’ rather than being concerned about what I needed to do in order to be happy. I went through many years of extreme mental desperation and turmoil because of this. It was not enjoyable, and I would not wish anything like that on my worst enemy. I was miserable. I drank way too much. That decision to be more concerned about what others might think, as compared to what I needed to be happy, had me very close to either committing suicide or contemplating the act of self-castration. Not good! I gradually grew to dislike my ‘male’ anatomy with a passion, and had I not pursued the SRS surgery I am doubtful whether I would have been able to continue with life as it was.

My decision has been very rewarding for me.  In retrospect, I most regret floundering in pity---the :why me syndrome,” for so long.  The procedures themselves were not painful.  The implant procedure wasn’t bad, and pain meds did wonders in the short time it took to heal.  With the major reassignment surgery, remember I was kept sedated for almost 6 days, and was on pain meds, so I never felt any real discomfort there either. 

In my next life, however, I do not plan to have to worry about going through the same turmoil and torment. I’m planning to return as a real girl in my next life and eliminate the need to deal with this situation again. 

I have learned my lesson.

ASS STUDY

WOMEN'S ASS SIZE STUDY

There is a new study about women and how they feel about their asses; the results were pretty interesting:
30% of women think their ass is too fat...
10% of women think their ass is too skinny...
The remaining 60% say they don't care, they love him, he's a good man and they wouldn't trade him for the world.

THE LITTLE OLD LADY

A little silver-haired lady calls her neighbor and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started." 

Her neighbor asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The little silver haired lady says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her neighbor decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. 

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,

" First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster." 

He takes her hand and says, "Secondly, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then," he said with a deep sigh ............ 



"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."

This Is How It Goes

So I guess this is how it goes.....and someday this is what we will become!

A group of 15-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Dairy Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant because they had only $6.00 among them and Jimmy Johnson, the cute boy in Social Studies, lived on that street.

10 years later...the group of 25-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the beer was cheap, the restaurant offered free snacks, the band was good, there was no cover and there were lots of cute guys.

10 years later... the group of 35-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the cosmos were good, it was right near the gym and, if they went late enough, there wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.

10 years later... the group of 45-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the martinis were big and the waiters had tight pants and nice buns.
10 years later... the group of 55-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the prices were reasonable, the wine list was good, the restaurant had windows that opened (in case of a hot flashes), and fish is good for cholesterol.

10 years later... the group of 65-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the lighting was good and the restaurant had an early bird special.
10 years later... the group of 75-years-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food was not too spicy and the restaurant was handicapped-accessible.

10 years later... the group of 85-years-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before. 

Words of Jefferson

"Laws that forbid the carrying of arms... disarm only those who are neither inclined nor determined to commit crimes... Such laws make things worse for the assaulted and better for the assailants; they serve rather to encourage than to prevent homicides, for an unarmed man may be attacked with greater confidence than an armed man."

~Thomas Jefferson

SEX AFTER DEATH

SEX AFTER DEATH

A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and... inform the other if there is sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all. After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact: " Marion ... Marion " "Is that you, Bob?" "Yes, I've come back like we agreed." "That's wonderful! What's it like?" "Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times... Then I have lunch (you'd be proud - lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to golf course again. Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again." "Oh, Bob! Are you in Heaven?" "No -- I'm a rabbit somewhere in South Carolina ."

The Dentist Visit

The Dentist Visit

A man goes to a female dentist to have a tooth extracted.

She pulls out a numbing needle to give the man a shot.
" No way! No needles. I hate needles" the patient said.

The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man says:
"I can't do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on suffocates
me!"

The dentist then asks the patient if he has any objections to taking a pill.
"No objection," he says. "I'm fine with pills."

The dentist gives him a couple of pills.
He swallows them. "What are they?" he says.

"Viagra," says the dentist.

"Damn," the patient says, "I didn't  know Viagra worked as a pain killer!"
"It doesn't" said the dentist, "But it will give you something to hold on to
when I pull your tooth."