The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
The trees are whistling for the
dogs.
The best parking place is determined by
shade instead of distance.
Hot water now comes out of both
taps.
You can make sun tea
instantly.
You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a
pretty good branding iron.
The temperature drops below 95 and you feel
a little chilly.
You discover that in July it only takes 2
fingers to steer your car.
You discover that you can get sunburned
through your car window.
You actually burn your hand opening the car
door.
You break into a sweat the instant you step
outside at 7:30 a.m.
Your biggest bicycle wreck fear
is,
"What if I get knocked out and end up lying
on the pavement and cook to death?"
You realize that asphalt has a liquid
state.
The potatoes cook underground,
so all you have to do is pull one out and
add butter, salt and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed
ice
to keep them from laying boiled
eggs.
The cows are giving evaporated milk
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