Ponder These 8 Thoughts...or is it nine?

EIGHT THOUGHTS TO PONDER:


Number  8

Life is  sexually transmitted and 100%  fatal.

Number 7

Good health is merely the  slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number  6

Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. They can't tell them apart.  If 
you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.

Number 5

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day.  Teach a person to use 
the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months,  maybe years.

Number 4

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital,  
dying of nothing.

Number 3

All of us could take a lesson from the weather:  it pays no attention to  
criticism.

Number 2

In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.  Now the  world is 
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought: 

Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers -- what you do today, might burn your 
ass tomorrow.

- -  - and as someone recently said to me: 
"Don't worry  about old age -- it doesn't last that long."