Saturday, November 9, 2013

IF MY BODY WERE A CAR


IF  MY BODY WERE A CAR

If  my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about  trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and  scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little dull,  but that's not the worst of it.


My  headlights are out of focus and it's especially hard to  see things  up close.


My traction  is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and  bump into things even in the best of weather.


My  whitewalls are stained with varicose veins.


It takes me  hours to reach my maximum speed.


My fuel  rate burns inefficiently.



But here's  the worst of it --


Almost  every time I sneeze, cough or sputter.....either my radiator leaks  or my exhaust backfires!